Blog
Insights for self-development and reflection – from myself and others whose work enriches my life.
The Nine Steps to Forgiveness
In a new series of videos on Greater Good, forgiveness expert Dr. Fred Luskin shares what he has learned from two decades of studying and teaching forgiveness. Dr. Luskin explains what forgiveness is and
How to Manage Anxiety & Covid-19 – Some Tips and Strategies
It’s been a while since I’ve posted a blog but I thought in these unprecedented times of Covid-19 it might be helpful to write about how to keep ourselves sane
Manufacturing Accounting: A Guide for Manufacturers
Besides the obvious benefits of financial planning and tax reports, financial analysis can also help you to see how well your company is running and identify areas for development. 54% of business
A guide for expats returning to Australia
Here is an article written by Grace Jennings-Edquist from ABC Life, August 6, 2018 Grace interviewed me for the article and as it addresses a pertinent topic for many of
The Art of Being Curious
In my work with individuals and especially with couples, I often talk about curiosity. What does it mean to be curious in a relationship? The art of being curious can
The Most Important Factor for Living a Happy and Fulfilling Life
This 75-Year Harvard Study Found the 1 Most Important Factor for Living a Happy and Fulfilling Life I think we can all agree that in this chaotic world, it’s difficult
Differentiation: A Key Component to a Successful Relationship*
*This article is based on an interview conducted by Diane Poole-Heller with Ellyn Bader as well as ‘Stepping Stones to Intimacy: A Positive Outlook on the Challenges All Couples Face’,
Two Essential Ingredients for a Successful Relationship
When clients ask me what I think is the most important ingredient for a successful relationship, I always answer: ‘respect and trust for one another.’ Without these two ingredients, it
Why Snooping is Such a Bad Idea by Esther Perel
Esther Perel is a sex and relationship therapist, the best-selling author of Mating in Captivity and a consultant for the hit Showtime series The Affair. Her TED talks on Desire and Infidelity have
Core Values
Peter Pearson, Ph.D. and his wife, Dr. Ellyn Bader, founded The Couples Institute in1984. Both are psychologists and directors of the Institute and have helped over a thousand couples in
Generative Communication
Esther Perel is a Belgian psychotherapist notable for exploring the tension between the need for security and the need for freedom in human relationships. She is the author of ‘Mating
What To Do When You Screw Up With Your Partner
This article is by Michelle Wangler Joy, a therapist who has been employed at The Couples Institute in Menlo Park, CA since 2002. Michelle provides both couples and individual counselling,
Coping with Over-Whelm
Feeling over-whelmed is something that happens to most of us. It usually creeps up on us, unawares, and then something happens that wakes us up to the feeling. Upon reflection,
Is Cheating Unfaithful or Unnatural?
By Lucy Wise-Chalker for The Newsroom, August 13, 2015 The beauty of a monogamous marriage Life’s short. Have an affair… If you have heard this slogan chances are
Interview with Lauren for The Age/Sydney Morning Herald
Counsellor Connecting with Clients in Growing Practice Date: June 27 2015 by Josh Jennings Counsellor Lauren Sokolski says she remembers spending three years counselling one client for the depression,
The Danger of Assumptions
How many times have you heard your partner say: “That’s not what I meant?” How many times have you said: “That’s not what I meant?” One thing is for sure:
How to Prevent Regret
What Will Your Legacy Be? by Steven Stosny, PhD, in Anger in the Age of Entitlement, April 9, 2014 Any therapist who has worked at all with senior
Core Values and your Relationship
This article was written by Peter Pearson who, together with his wife Ellyn Bader, founded The Couples Institute in 1984 in Menlo, California. You and your partner formed a relationship
Do You Always Agree with your Partner
Are you someone who thinks that a good relationship means you have to agree with each other about everything? Many people believe that the sign of a good relationship is
Understanding Separation
Over the years, I have worked extensively with couples as well as individuals around the issue of separation. I have worked with couples and individuals who are in the process
The Space Between Words
You know how we all receive emails forwarded by someone who received it from someone who received it from someone else…? Some of these emails I delete right away, or
Learn How to Manage your Anxiety
Feeling anxious is something that happens to all of us at times and is nothing to be ashamed of. I found it really helpful to learn some innovative strategies for
How to Invest in your Relationship
We all want a relationship that is emotionally fulfilling. We want to feel loved, valued and respected by our partner. Lots of relationships start off this way. There is the
Rebuilding your Relationship after an Affair
When one partner has an affair, it causes damage to the primary relationship (the relationship that you’re in full-time with your partner). An affair can sometimes mean the end of
The Myth of True Love
“If he really loved me, he would know how I’m feeling… If she really loved me, she would know what I’m thinking…” I can’t count the number of times I’ve
The Concept of Repair: in the aftermath of conflict
Because all relationships have some level of conflict, how you manage conflict is important. It can be hard to do conflict well when you’re under stress or feeling triggered by
How To Manage Conflict In Our Relationships With Others
Every relationship, be it intimate, friendship, collegial or familial, has some level of conflict at one point or another. Some relationships are fraught with conflict whereas others have seemingly no
The Key Ingredient for a Successful Relationship
When I get asked what I think is the most important ingredient for a good relationship, you may be surprised to hear that I don’t say ‘love.’ In our
Making Time For Your Relationship
Most of us lead very busy lives. For many of us, work takes up a big part of our week. With modern technology, mobile phones and email are hard to